Posts Tagged ‘bok choy kimchi’

 

Boy choy kimchi

by baldilocks

I’ll stop eating if Leftists go first.

In the winter of 2016, Liz Connelly and Kali Wilgus took a road trip from their home in Portland, Oregon to Puerto Nuevo, Mexico.  They fell in love with the tortillas they ate on the beaches there.  Liz told a reporter from the Willamette Week, “I picked the brains of every tortilla lady there in the worst broken Spanish ever, and they showed me a little of what they did.”

Liz and Kali came back to Portland, and they opened a food cart from which they sold burritos comparable to what they had tasted in Puerto Nuevo.  Alas, Kali and Liz did not realize they were committing a great wrong in selling delicious burritos culturally appropriated from Mexico.  Fortunately, this wrong was halted (along with their food cart business) when some brave Portlanders went to battle on their computers and, with death threats and tweets, stopped this outrage. (…)

If selling food from other cultures is cultural appropriation, then isn’t eating it cultural appropriation as well?  I couldn’t sleep worrying about this.  I had been going to Indian restaurants and Chinese food trucks for years, not knowing I was committing a crime against foreign cultures.

The stress was too much.  I already was feeling guilty about my white privilege, and now this!  I flew all the way out to Seattle to take Laura Humpf’s Undoing Whiteness yoga class [hahaha] to reduce my stress and rid myself of my toxic whiteness.  Imagine how disturbed I became when I learned that yoga too is cultural appropriation.  I first realized this when a free yoga class was shut down in a college in Canada by students especially attuned to these issues.

I decided to stop going to ethnic restaurants and to live off the Israeli salad I make at home and the American hamburgers and corn I eat for dinner, along with cereal and milk for breakfast.  I figured that since I am Jewish, Israeli salad is OK…until the day that I passed a banner on the University of Pennsylvania campus.  That banner condemned Israel for appropriating Israeli salad from the Palestinians.

My neighbor is fantastically integrated; Hispanic- and Korean-Americans mostly, with good sprinkling of black and white. Within walking distance from my apartment is a small-chain restaurant whose fare is emblematic of the neighborhood. The food is best described as pseudo-Asian: rice bowls with meat. But they also serve hamburger or fried chicken with fries and quesadillas. The beef quesadillas have a teriyaki flavor to them.

It’s fast food using mostly real food.

The owners are Korean immigrants and will sometimes offer a side of store-bought cabbage kimchi. And something very sweet happened last week, one of the owners – Amy – had prepared homemade bok choy kimchi and gave me a big vat of it because she knows I like it. It was tasty.

Oh and fun fact: their main cook is a Hispanic dude named Omar.

My point?

Leftists will have to pry my cultural appropriation from my cold dead hands! Damn killjoys.

Let them eat nothing.

By the way, Leftists, did you know that watermelon and coffee are indigenous to Africa?

Juliette Akinyi Ochieng has been blogging since 2003 as baldilocks. Her older blog is here.  She published her first novel, Tale of the Tigers: Love is Not a Game in 2012.

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